Fun with Stooges et al

So school's been in session for over a month (yes, this is what we do in the South - school starts WAY early) and I'm getting fun reports back from Curly and Moe's teachers. Neither is doing much as far as producing homework or participating in class. Happy happy, Joy joy. Neither kid can give me a good reason. So both are on semi-permanent restriction. And I'm told I'm so MEAN.

Curly was home sick yesterday. He had a fever and was feeling crappy, coughing and such, so I let him stay home. About 3 pm yesterday, I get a call from Curly. "Why is Grandma here?" he asked. I knew instantly that he wasn't talking my mother, but my MIL. Who had shown up unannounced. To stay for four days.

Mind you, my MIL doesn't live nearby. No, she lives in Florida, a good 365 miles away. So it's not like she just was in the neighborhood and meandered over. She knew well in advance that she would be here.

I called DH and asked him what he knew about his mother's presence. "Well, I told you she would be coming on Wednesday!" "But it's Tuesday." "Um - oh. I didn't know about this."

And my MIL has done this kind of shit before. Once when Larry was little, I was at work and on the phone with DH (who was home early), when he told me that someone was at the door. And there was his mother. The house was a total wreck, I had been working a zillion hours, and it was almost Christmas and the guest room was covered in Christmas Crap. I thought murder might happen. When I got home that night, I had to take a beer and nurse it for a while in my bedroom before I could deal with her.

Needless to say, I find showing up at someone's home - unannounced - with the intention of using that home as a hotel, to be incredibly RUDE.

But I digress.

Turns out said MIL is here to help my sister in law & her husband (Amy's parents). (Amy's parents live in a tiny, tiny house, with no guest room.) The husband - well, let's just say he has some major issues. And it's fine and noble and everything for my MIL to help them, but, dammit, couldn't she call?

So now the kids are totally stressed due to unexpected arrival of company. By the time I got home, Curly was grumpy and complaining and Moe was doing his best to ignore the fact he had homework and they were both picking at each other.

The Stooges are not all to fond of this grandparent. It's not that she's a bad person, but she has what DH refers to as a congenital defect - she cannot self edit anything she says. So whatever comes into her head pops out of her mouth - ugliness, not unlike toads or slugs. Or vomit. She will say ANYTHING and it can be very hurtful. (Plus, she talks through her nose.) (That was ugly of me. I'm sorry.) Teens are very sensitive and feel that life is all about THEM and any criticism they hear can be devastating, especially for someone with other issues, like depression or bi-polar disorder.

So I went through the evening and didn't drink (I don't, not that I have addiction issues, I just don't care to drink) and I didn't kill anyone. Which was pretty damn noble of me, don't you think?

Larry hid in the basement for most of the evening. After the MIL went to bed, he quietly confessed to me that he has been having panic attacks lately, and having his grandmother show up like this brought one on today. This was the first I'd heard about his panic attacks. Larry has some issues with depression. He's been on meds before, but he doesn't want to take them, and I haven't been able to get him to do much therapy. I told him he probably needed the meds, they would help him and not make him stupid or dopey, and usually the same thing for depression helps panic attacks. So he is looking at going to his physician this week. Whew. Maybe that issue will get better. Maybe.

On the work front, I found out yesterday that I will be required to do monthly reviews of my staff in the same format as we do annual reviews. Since annual reviews take an enormous amount of time, I'm sure I can fit those monthly ones in and do my job too. Sounds like fun, huh? In truth, this seems an incredible waste of time, and a gross form of micro-management by The Powers That Be. But that's life in a major recession working for a semi-governmental agency.

I want a GOOD day sometime this week.


Pray that I don't lose my little marbles. And I STILL haven't finished tatting that damn hanky!