Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Comings and goings

Moe has come and Moe has gone.

He went off to a church youth group camp on Monday of last week.  I picked him up on Saturday afternoon, tired and tan. And Sunday morning he went off again.

Not all the troop went!
He went with his troop to Boy Scout camp in the northern part of our state. And he won't be back again until this Saturday. Since DH is out of town on business, I'm pretty much on my own this week.

I kinda miss Moe. He's a cheery presence, always glad to spend time with his mom and have a giggle. But I'm certain he's having a really good time now.

This is something Moe made in the youth group camp. Pretty nice work for a 14 year old boy who'd never done this before, wouldn't you say? It's a form of macrame. I told him I'd be glad to get him some supplies if he wants to make more.

On the Curly front...  Le Sigh.

While Curly is doing better is some cases, he seems to have zero common sense about most things, and now he is reaping the rewards of No Sense. It's as if he never thinks anything possible could go wrong, and when it does, he's surprised and horrified. Most of us go through life as we do while driving - practicing defensive driving, assuming that the other drivers will mess up. Curly assumes that all is golden. He's very trusting, and he gets hurt. In lots of ways.

For example: months ago, he gave a military recruiter his Social Security Card, his birth certificate, and his high school diploma. Not copies, but the actual documents. Now he needs these items, and they have all been lost. All. I've gotten him a birth certificate several times before, and I'm not doing it again. He needs to learn how.

Friday he got a money order for $120 to pay court-ordered expenses. Curly put the money order in his wallet and went to some party. Who knows what happened there - but the money order disappeared. Previously he showed some of his less than trustworthy acquaintances (AKA his druggy friends) some money that he had put in a box ($600), and then the money vanished. Imagine that.

He left an open bottle of prescription medicine out where he lives. The cat knocked it into some water, and the pills are ruined. He can't get this re-filled until July1, and it costs a ton. Fortunately it was not his Lithium, only his ADHD medicine. (He's taking his Lithium, thank heavens. And going to his psychiatrist.)

This is chronic. He's always putting his things down and forgetting where he left them. DH and I are worried about him - how's the boy gonna manage? Curly is 19, and he should be able to pay attention a little better. Plus, he has an old girlfriend who's jerking his heart around BAD. He doesn't seem to be able to tell who might be a real friend and who is bad to be around. He's a remarkably bad judge of character, way too trusting.

Curly's NOT stupid by any stretch. He's a smart kid, great in book learning, very artistic and musical. He just has No Sense.

Ah, me. A mother worries. He IS working (some), and he's still living up the street from us, and he's still coming over and spending time with us. It's something. I just wish he could have his eyes opened without so much pain...

Vader doesn't worry a bit. (I love how he stretches out like this, getting his whole tummy on the cool tile and showing his black little paddy paws.)


  1. Keep your head up, he will learn... As a mother sometimes we have to step back & watch them fall. It kills me to do that with my daughter, but....

  2. I too hate letting my children fall on their faces, but they have to learn. however, could his less then stellar common sense be a side affect of his meds? I can't see him not learning anything while you had him growing up.

  3. Oh, a mother's lot - He will learn, but you will never stop fretting! We never do!

    Take a page from Vader's book... Lie on the floor and relax!!!
    Fox : ))

  4. Scouting is wonderful for teenagers, it gives them a sense of belonging and Keeps Them Off the Streets. So do music lessons and bands.....
    The most painful thing of all is to have to sit and watch a child fall over time and time again and to know that you can do nothing to help. But you are there for him to come to when he needs to do that, and that is important.

  5. Moe! He's such a sweetie. And not short on creative talent by the looks of his camp project. Never having met the lad, I still want to hug him.

    Curley - well, him I just want to pull aside...but of course I never will. It is best to wish him well, hope for the best and trust in the lessons you and your DH have taught him.

    Big hugs to you and happy tatting!

  6. It pains me to know your son is learning through the school of Hard Knocks. But you're doing right by him in the long run by not bailing him out because experience IS the best teacher of good decision-making.
    That Moe--what a sweetie.

  7. Hang in there. I thought my daughter would never make it to 25, but when she did, it was like some kind of switch flipped (literally) and suddenly she was making actual GOOD decisions. Like really getting that GED. Like wanting to go to college, etc. "They" now say the brain doesn't really mature enough to see the consequences of actions until around 25, so there's hope! I will keep you in my thoughts.

    Oh, and a "swamper" is an evaporative cooler that cools a house by actually putting moisture INTO the air. With a relative humidity here of around 14% and temps in the 90s, a bit of water really helps!!

    Just FYI!