A Christmas story. And yes, this really happened.

On Christmas of about 1990, my then husband and I were celebrating at our home with our 2 year old, just the three of us. I was handed a present from my MIL and started opening it. 

Now my MIL is petite, trim and athletic, and I am quite chunky and a klutz. My MIL had, um, "endeared" herself to me in an early meeting with her when she asked me helpfully (in front of all her friends and family) oh when was I planning to have breast reduction surgery, hmm? 

My mouth hung open for a bit as this was something I had never contemplated. 

Diplomacy and subtlety were not my MIL's virtues. She had permanent foot in mouth disease. 

Anyhow, I opened up this heavy package and found it contained an unbelievably horrid gift. It was Miss Piggy scales - the kind you weigh yourself with. It was pink and purple and plasticky and Miss Piggy's eyes closed when you stepped on her face, so as not to look up your skirt.

Dear lord in heaven, it was awful. 

I was appalled. I was speechless. I didn't know what to say when this woman was making an obvious comment on my weight in such a tasteless manner. My husband roared. 

I did not acknowledge the present, and Miss Piggy was put into the attic. I moved on. 

But wait - there's more! 

Years later I brought up Miss Piggy to a coworker when my company was having a White Elephant present game at Christmas. I thought she'd be perfect! So I got Miss Piggy out of the attic. 

"I wonder if Miss Piggy is in good shape?" thought I. The box had not been opened by me on that long ago Christmas, as I was consumed by the horror of the original present opening.

So I opened the box up and safe and sound, out slid Miss Piggy... 

Along with birthday cards addressed to my MIL. 

Yes, dear reader, she had REGIFTED Miss Piggy to me! 

My MIL was cheap and had regifted items before, but this was so brazen it made the story worthwhile! 

BWAAHAHAHAHA! 

Miss Piggy went on to find a home with a hapless coworker. 

Sans the birthday cards. Those I just couldn't inflict on someone else. 

HO HO HO!!!

 

Some frivolous kitty pictures

I mentioned that Moe and Larry have moved into their own flat. They also have their own lovely kitties.

They have Pete and Oreo.

Pete and Oreo doing what cats do

Pete is a little girl cat who came from the Ex. Somehow the Ex (who isn't stupid) thought she was a He and hence the name. 

She's pretty cute

Pete is still a rambunctious kitten, but she's not going to be as big as Oreo.

Oreo is a large lad

Oreo spends much of his life sleeping. He is a big boy with a lot of tummy.

He doesn't mind being held like a baby. My kitties can't stand this.

Oreo has a lot to say, and sticks his nose into many things.

Pet me!

They are very good kitties!

Speaking of good kitties...

Theo reclining

Mine have the good life here.

Lucy is so pretty

Lucy is my decorator cat. She matches ALL décor.

They have a mighty fine life, and are wonderful companions for me.

A bit of tatting

Hello. Remember me? That Crazy Mom?

Much has happened since I've been here. 

I still live in my gorgeous flat in metro Hotlanta. I'm still kicking - yea! 

Lucy and Theo still live me me. Theo has become a tad portly. They are living the good life.

Aren't they gorgeous?

Theo is such a cutie. His tail curls into a circle!

He sometimes watches TV.

He is a funny boy

I haven't gotten Covid19, thanks to serious hiding and 2 vaccines and 2 boosters (soon to be 3). 

I've dated some guys - but I'm not right now. Not until Covid19 is really long gone. 

And....   

Some things have been bad. Pretty awful. God awful in fact.

I lost my job in early 2020, right when the pandemic started. NOT fun. Fortunately there was unemployment, and I'm frugal.

I was bored, so I made a ton of masks for my church. And then I started knitting....

4 of sooooo many...

I knitted a TON of dish clothes. Many, many dish clothes. I gave almost all of them away.

While I was in the throes of no job and pandemic, the Ex moved and decided to throw Larry out of his house. So I took Larry in and he lived with me for a while. Much longer than I wanted. Larry became embedded in my spare bedroom.

During that time, Curly developed major addiction issues and went off to rehab for 9 months. Yes, we all want our children to grow up to be addicts...

In November 2020 I got a job working remote at home, for less money than I had before. But it was a JOB and I was glad to have it. It came with benefits, a good thing.

Larry struggled with depression. But I was working, so we managed.

Curly got out of rehab in July of 2021 and moved in to my place for what was supposed to be 2 weeks, living on a blow up twin bed in my living room. So now I had 2 grown sons living with me. Moe was still with the Ex. 

And then.... 

Curly relapsed. Doing the hardest of the hard drugs.

Here's a lesson for you: never EVER have an opioid addict live with you. They will steal from you, lie to you, abuse you in every way, wreck your car, and turn your place into a flop house.

Results of Curly's addiction. Don't live with an addict.

In the mean time, I was absolutely hating my job. I had a boss from hell and was grossly underpaid.

So I started looking.

Lo and Behold, A Great Company recruited me. For a lot more money and better benefits, still working remote! With a great boss! Hurrah! I started with the Great Company in November of 2021.

And Larry (who had been entrenched and depressed) got a job working from home. Hurrah again!

In January of this year, Larry and Moe moved into an apartment 10 minutes from me. Moe is working too and they are happy in their apartment. They have cats. Huzzah for them!

On Easter, I finally was able to get Curly into Rehab again. It took his brothers working with me to force him out (it's complicated) but he actually got out and went into detox and then rehab. Larry and Moe spent a lot of time cleaning up my place and de-filthing it. It was really disgusting. But that's over!

Curly is now out of Rehab, but he's NOT living with me and he is clean and sober and is actively trying to remain that way. Thank you Jesus. 

So now I can tat. In peace. And relax. In peace.

Oh - I guess you want to see what I've been working on?

In progress...

I worked on a larger project. It's tatting in Lizbeth size 20 white.

A collar, to which I added beads. The pattern is here.

I made this to send to our newest Supreme Court Justice, in honor of the late Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg. RBG wore collars with her robes all the time.

Here's another picture, with a US dime for size. I actually removed the loop and button closure and replaced it with a satin ribbon as I thought it would lie better. I have sent it off to Justice Jackson - I hope she wears it!

Anyhow, that's the news from the Crazy Mom! How is life for you?

I'm a city gal now

Yes folks, I have exited Hooterville.

I now live in town. It's an area of Hotlanta much like Greenwich Village - hip, sort of bohemian, easy access to everything. I am a happy camper.

It was a tough move - the movers were still at my place at 10 pm on Thursday night. And I was at work bright and early Friday morning! I still have boxes to unpack, but I'm getting there.

Theo is getting used to being a cool city cat.

The cats are adjusting. They were traumatized for a few days, but they seem to feel better now, and play with each other or spend time gazing out the many windows.

My living space is looking better. Still need to paint and hang pictures, but it's comfy! (BTW - that big overstuffed chair is a recliner!)

And oh what a view I have - sunsets every night. This one was on Sunday evening.

And soon I'll be tatting again....
 

Moving time!

I am prepping to move into my new-to-me condo on  Thursday of this week. I'm a touch busy.

The carpet was laid in the bedrooms last Monday. I got the thickest pad I could, so the footing there feels lovely and squishy.

This is but a nightmare of a memory now

The electrician came last Wednesday to install many light fixtures and remove a) that aesthetic horror of a fan in my bedroom (see above) and b) lots of my money.

See how nice my kitchen looks now? I added pendants and under cabinet lighting, plus I replaced DREADFUL track lighting with something more discrete.

At home, I'm packing things and deciding what I can truly live without until after the move, like hair curlers and spices. And drinking glasses. Also what is all this shit in my freezer? Who knows?

So I'm trying NOT to buy anything that I absolutely can't live without, mostly food. Cat food is an essential item - the cats do not like to wait. Lucy meows at me piteously in the morning like she is STARVING and then I go down and find her bowl is half full and I'm without real sympathy. Bitch that I am.

Lucy - I do not feel sorry for her

There really are some weird things in my refrigerator/freezer. Why did I buy that prosciutto and cheese log? And all these eggs? Why do I have 4 different kinds of mustard? And frozen fried cheese ravioli - why? Goat cheese with cranberries on it?

There seems to be a cheese theme here.

I also have lots of frozen veggies with cheese sauce. Cheese and broccoli - yum. But I also have like 4 individual 1 lb. packages of frozen ground beef, uncooked. What the hell? And packages of Hot Pockets. I've never eaten Hot Pockets in my life. These must be Moe's - they need to go to his house.

I think hoarding all this stuff goes back to the days of having All The Stooges in the house, as They Ate Everything. So I had to Be Prepared. Even now they show up at my house and stand in front of the open refrigerator, noshing on whatever is there.

St Paul's Cathedral from One Change Place

Oh, I forgot to show pictures from my recent visit across the pond! I was in London on business, and made a side trip to visit an Old Git!

Recognize anyone? Recognize the decoration on her blouse? (This is in her own garden.)

Jane was kind enough to take me to Anne Hathaway's cottage, which is SO beautiful. No, not the actress - Shakespeare's wife.

The cottage is quite lovely, especially the gardens. Really grand to be there. I got in a nice visit with Nick as well, and Tilly allowed me to pet her. I felt honored.

But now I must get back to The Horror of Packing. And someday, perhaps even this month, I will tat again....
 

What's that Crazy Mom been up to?

I'll bet you thought I just gave up the ghost. No, I've been busy.

I've been VERY busy at work. Lots of things to do, but I like it a lot. We are moving to a different floor in the building - below is my view from my office. Note that I said office - I won't be in a cube - hurrah!

I've been dating a bit. On and off. Mostly off. Mostly guys I'm not interested in - and then there was that guy who as soon as he met me, he kissed me stuck his freakin' tongue down my freakin' throat. EWWWWW!!! No second date with that one. Yuck.

I've been dealing with the Stooges.

Larry has had some very serious health issues that required 2 hospitalizations - and he has no health insurance. I flew down to FL to be with him during the first - and scariest - of the hospital visits. And now he has no job, so we moved him back up to Hotlanta to live with his brothers. He's going to be ok, needs to get a job and concentrate on getting better.

Moe has graduated from high school!  DH The Ex and I saw him do it and were very happy to have the youngest done. As to what he will do now - I have no idea. He has not applied to a single college. SOOOO frustrating. Get a job Moe! Go to college!

 

Curly - remember my frustrations with Curly? Cross your fingers, the worst of that seems over! Curly is working selling mobile phones and plans for a big company, does a great job for them, they want him to be store manager soon. He's taking his meds! He's got a girlfriend with personality and ambition! He seems grateful for things I've done for him! He calls me up and tells me he loves me!

All the Stooges are now out of my house. They have moved in with DH The Ex, who lives nearby in a nice brick ranch with a big yard. DH The Ex volunteered to do have them all. We are on good terms - of course, he wants me back big time. That ain't happening.

I've tatted a little tiny bit. Here's something I made for one of the guys I've been going out with.

And I'm teaching again at Tat Days - I'm doing 2 of Nina's gorgeous patterns.

I've had my own share of health issues - no worries, I'm fine! But I had a stay in the hospital too, had cellulitis. I had my laptop with me and worked the entire time, 'cause that's what I do. (And why my company loves me...) And I had this lovely view:

This is not abstract art - it was a lovely view of the hospital roof

I'm better. Really I am. I was annoyed to have to be there.

However - one of the biggest things that I've been doing is finding new housing - for me, not the Stooges, just me and the cats. And I've found a place.

A condo just for ME!!!!

In this complex.Yes, this is the view from the 2nd bedroom.

With this view at night from my balcony.

This is the daytime view from a different angle - you can see the Hotlanta skyscrapers.

The condo is in a part of Hotlanta that's its own little city, considered one of the top 10 most walkable urban areas in the country. More than 40 restaurants within walking distance. Seven miles to my office. A block to the subway. It's safe. It's artsy. It's hip. It's not in the cultural desert that I've been living in. And no real maintenance. I'll close on it very soon - and I'll have it totally paid off by the time I retire. Woo-hoo!!!!

Oh - and I'm heading to London Monday on business - I have to hire a new staff member in that office. Across the pond I go!

And that Saturday - I'll see Jane!!

And then some other stuff happened....

Dear Friends

Just so you'll know, I haven't fallen in a hole, I haven't died, I haven't forgotten how to tat.

But I have been VERY busy.

Saturday was a year since Chez Crazy burnt down. And it's taken much of the year to recover. Some things have not recovered - but I am well.

 We have chosen NOT to rebuild the house. As Moe is in his last year of high school and I've been commuting into Hotlanta for lo these many years, I've decided to use the opportunity to move into a condo in town after he graduates. For now, we're living in a little rental home near the site of the old Chez Crazy (AKA the Ash Heap).

I worked for a LONG time to get the final list to the insurance company on the contents of the home. I have to tell you, this is not for the faint of heart. Think about listing by name every SINGLE item in your home, the brand name, when you bought it, what you paid for it, where it was located. Ugh. Fortunately I had enough sense to hire a Property Adjuster to help me - they were able to help build the claim and work with the insurance company to get the maximum value for me.

We have some bare minimum furnishings in the home, just enough for us. I don't know what I'll need when I move to a condo - I'll get those things then.

But we DID get some kitties! Moe begged and begged, he was missing kitties so bad.

This is Lucy.

And this is Theo.

They were fostered together and play nicely. They are very close in age, but not litter mates. They sleep with me. And Moe is happy.

Larry is happy living in Florida. Curly is out on his own in an apartment nearby, selling mobile phones. Moe is doing whatever seniors in high school do. I'm happy in my job. And DH....

Oh dear.

That's where this gets complicated.

After 28 years of marriage, DH and I divorced. It's quite complicated - but the end of any marriage is. DH The Ex and I remain on very good terms; I'm even on good terms with my MIL. He's not a bad man, and I wish him no ill. But I could no longer be married to him. And frankly, the fire made divorcing him easier for me.

Funny how things happen, isn't it?

Anyhow, I'm moving on with my next phase of my life. I haven't tatted much, though I did teach at Tat Days 2014. I'm doing a bit of photography. And I'm looking into dating (which is SO weird!).....

So folks, I'll be back, just on an occasional basis. Wish me well, won't you?
 

Tatters are the nicest people

First off, I really, really appreciate the sympathy and warm wishes after our recent fire. Folks have been so kind to us. Lots of people have reached out and sent emails, cards, and more. I feel really fortunate. It's good to be loved.

And if I haven't responded to your email, don't be offended. I'm, um, kinda busy.

By the way, things are going pretty well. We are moving into a furnished rental home on Friday, all paid for by the insurance. It's close to our old place (AKA the ash heap), it's the right size, and quite by accident, it's on Moe's school bus route! I can't wait to have a kitchen again - eating out all the time really gets old. 

Back to tatters.

I found a lovely card that appeared in my mail.  

It was a card from my friend Joanie, with this pretty tatted angel inside. Wasn't that nice? It made my day. The angel is beautiful. Thank you, Joanie.

Later in the week, a box appeared. (BTW, my neighbor is getting the mail. My house burned, but the mailbox still works great.) What could be inside?

Wow! A treasure trove of things, all the basics any good tatter could desire. All courtesy the wonderful Georgia Seitz. Three balls of Lizbeth, a crochet hook, two shuttles and picot gauges (made by Richard Seitz), plus a ton of tatting patterns. I'm overwhelmed. So thoughtful. Thank you very kindly, Georgia.

Now - on to deal with all the stuff that happens with moving. Utilities, deposits, furniture, etc.

I think I will fix meatloaf the first night. The Stooges like meatloaf.

Back to normal soon....